Thursday, October 29, 2009

Forgive Me This

I know it is very inappropriate to talk about marital issues with anyone other than

that spouse..............

But my heart just got broke into a thousand pieces and

while i feel very sad ....

I also feel Flabergasted and appauled at the accusation that.....

GET THIS:

I am not making the same sacrificing that Matt is.

He is going to work and traveling to pay our debts and get us in a better situation....

and is FRUSTRATED with me cuz his sacrificing is bigger than mine!


YEAH .......I KNOW.  RUDE HUH!

and uncalled for i might add.

DONT MIND ME!

i'm just living in a hotel with 3 kids and a dog and have given up any

home or vehicle that i had posession of in the last year!!!!!!


I know he will take it back and apologize endlessly for saying that to me.
As pukey as it feels to say right now, He is a good guy.
He just should have left that lil'  ugly thought that popped into his head right where
he found it!
 

Have you ever said something out loud that you know you should not have?
Like you may have believed it when it crossed your mind but then  you say it outloud and reallize
that it's probably not entirely true and  it was that natural man in you screaming to get out.

The adversary loves it when we do that!
 Yah - anyways- the words still were said...and  they caused someone's heart hurt.
Mine this time.
I feel a little better already.
thanks for letting me vent.

(i have to delete this post before Matt gets home ...and i am sure i will

feel regretful in an hour anyhow.....
but i just had to get it off my chest.)

So forgive me this please.

shell

6 comments:

  1. Sounds like you worked through that pretty well, but you still need to hear that you have given up every bit as much, and we are amazed, no...blown away by your "do-it-for-the-family spirit". But he sounds like he doesn't think he's appreciated for what he's doing, either. Why else would he say something so far from the truth? Love you bunches & bunches!

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  2. Here is my wisdom to impart on you..since I am much older and less wiser..Competition in marriage is the thing that destroys. Whenever we compete against the other, we are putting ourselves above another..and that is PRIDE. We all know what pride does! BEWARE OF PRIDE!
    How am I so smart and wise? Cuz I was raised to be competitive..how many times do you think I have to work on this....EVERY 2 seconds. But, I am the better half, after all!

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  3. Oh and PS..stress makes us do stupid things. Chocolate makes stupid go away :)

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  4. He loves you very much! J

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  5. stacy, funny you should mention chocolate! he came home and slowly removed chocolate bars one by one from a grocery bag... 4 of them .

    then he handed me a dr. pepper to seal the deal!

    he said "i dont mean to sugarcoat this....but i am sorry for what i said"

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  6. You have beautiful children and a love that has allowed you to walk away from the things that provide you comfort. Raising children is difficult, raising them in a strange or changing environment is beyond imaginable. Vent when you need to. Get it out and move on. If our blogs provide you with any comfort or moment of distraction in a chaotic life, we have achieved well beyond our wildest dreams.

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